15 September 2005

The Conspiracy Continues

1. Pump up American patriotism.
2. Accuse Republican Jews of spying for Israel.
3. Assasinate Arafat to get the ball rolling on the Road Map.
4. Place the most influential Jewish PAC in D.C. under investigation.
5. Get the Israeli Ambassador to the U.S. to say that the Road Map isn't about the Palestinians, it's about Israel/U.S. relations.
6. Execute the evacuation of Gaza. Punctuate the atrocity with remarks about how the Israelis will "have to do more" and that this is only the beginning.
7. Hand down an indictment against those Republican Jews who are "spying on the United States for Israel."
8. Watch as all those American patriots turn their backs on Israel.

From The American Free Press: "As for the Bush administration and the neo-cons within it who have argued that Israel is America’s best ally, the grand jury indictments tell a different story."

Yes. And the Free Masons are in on it too-- in fact, they're bringing the cake to the victory party. On behalf of the Jews of the world, mwha ha ha ha. Pardon me whilst I rub my hands together fiendishly.

Now, let's set the record straight:

Libs hate Jews. Why wouldn't they? They're socialists. Everything in them, every political belief they espouse, is in direct contradiction to everything Jews believe. I feel absolutely no need to expound on that. Should you care to argue, try reading a biography of Karl Marx that includes some of his early works and personal writings, and then try and prove me wrong.

Conservatives.. well, quite frankly, I think Jews are a little too... Jewish for conservatives lately. Conservatives like to think of G-d in a very ecumenical sense, if they have to make Him public at all. Besides, having a Jew in the room means you have to give consideration to Israel nowadays, and no gentile American has learned how to deal with that black sheep. The libs are busy calling Zionists "colonial imperialists" while the Conservatives are busy trying to decide if anti-Semitism and anti-Zionism are the same thing. In any case, having gained so much ground in the 2004 elections, conservatives don't feel like having the contemporary Jewish question nagging at them while they're in their stride.

Christians, well, most Jews would probably say that most Christians have never liked the Jews, at least not since those Romans stole their religion out from under their feet. After all, there was that whole Crusades thing, followed by that whole Inquisition thing, followed by those Pogroms, peppered through with quite a few expulsions from various countries, mostly all by Church dictum, and, well, you'd have to be a moron not to get the picture. But, hey, this is the 20th century, right? The Christian Church (this includes Catholics and Protestants) isn't quite as powerful now as it was in the middle ages; they can't exactly go around evicting Jews from the nations of the world. Instead, they're using their limited resources to try and evict the nation of Israel from the globe! Mainline churches, including the Methodist, Presbyterian, and Church of England denominations, have all either agreed to, or are considering divesting from Israel. Apparently, instead of killing them with kindness the Church has now decided to kill their so-called enemies with kapitalism. To top it all off, the new Pope is an ex-Nazi youth; 'nuff said.

Now, to be fair, there are evangelical Christians out there who support Israel. To a degree. One Tennessee preacher was quite vocal in protesting the disengagement plan. Other evangelicals were quoted in newspapers, citing hurricane Katrina as a direct result of U.S. support for disengagement (a position with which I completely agree). Some online Jewish forums even scoffed at the idea that more evangelicals in America protested the disengagement than did Jews. So, there are some Christians out there who like Jews... to a degree.

George W. Bush was one of them. He was pro-Israel the whole nine yards in his first term. Well, except for proposing that whole Road Map to Peace which was quickly swept under the rug until after he won re-election and garnered the greatest percentage of the American Jewish vote in 20th century Republican campaign history. Oh, but he has a lot of neocons on his staff! And a lot of them are Jews!!

American Jews, that is. Of course, two entries ago I expounded on this topic with great fervor. Therefore, I will restrict my comments here to the bare minimum, my point being this: even Jews can be too Jewish for Jews! The concept that Jews are out there, trying to spy on America and take over the world, is so beyond ludicrous when one considers the fact that Jews have spent nearly the entirety of their existence as a people trying to get out of being Jewish!

Think about it. Being Jewish means having responsibilities like keeping Torah, humbling yourself and worshipping HaShem, being a light unto the nations, and making a way for the Messiah. It's not exactly a nine to fiver from which you can quickly retreat to the bar. If you do your job right, you get unbearable flack. People spread rumors that you drink the blood of babies and are busy trying to "ethnically cleanse" your neighbors as part of your fiendish plan to take over the world. Others view you with continual suspicion that often leads to hate crimes, if not mass execution. Ignorant myths that forced 50 generations of your ancestors into the ghetto still plague your every day life in some form or fashion.

Now, if you do your job poorly, you still get crap. Say you're the most secular, non-affiliated, atheistic Jew there could be. The only way you identify with being Jewish is by reading an occasional copy of "Heeb" magazine while wearing your "Shalom Motherfucker" t-shirt. Chances are more than not that you're still plagued with paranoia. You're part of the Holocaust generation; the kids who were raised secular and identify with their Jewish roots often solely through understanding that goys hated Jews so much that they killed six million of them less than 100 years ago. You're left with the stigma of death, the weight of perpetual fear on your shoulders. Conciously or subconciously, being Jewish is equated with being hated. Anything you can do to avoid being Jewish, you'll do. But the guilt nags at you. That guilt that comes from ignoring your inheritance. So you embrace your Judakitsch by throwing on that funny t-shirt and reading that goyish magazine, figuring the more gentile you look, the better. Screw ancestral, Biblical responsibilities; that stuff's ancient history, anyway.

Yeah, and "there's no way the land of Israel can go back to its Biblical borders" too. Phh. Yes, world, you definitely need to fear the Republican Jews of AIPAC and their cohorts in the Bush administration. I mean, they're so obviously part of the Jewish conspiracy to take over the world, that they're in favor of giving away Jewish land to people who want to kill them! Now that's what I call gaining global territory.

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